Details have been changed to protect my client.
A woman referred to me by a trusted friend had lost her mother ten years earlier. It was a devastating loss increased because of the physical distance that prevented her from making a trip to Africa from the US.
With the loss of her mother came the guilt of not being able to see her before she died. She was a single parent with kids and the expense to travel and the lack of childcare meant the hardest decision of her life, and felt like a slap in the face to her mother — enter deep sorrow mixed with shame.
In our 2 hour session (first and last), I suggested that the best thing would be to have her feel a lightening of the burden of shame, of that hard decision, so she could feel more present, more in tune with what’s going on now, and more empowered in her life.
She was ready to launch her small business and had realized that this burden of shame seemed to get her stuck, scared and paralyzed. She agreed with me, “Feeling lighter would be really good.”
So I began with suggesting that she think of a place in nature where she feels grounded, peaceful, empowered and secure. Immediately she thought of a place in the mountains.
As she breathed with eyes closed, I asked her to “inhale the energy of the mountain, and release any thoughts or worries, and then return to absorbing, inhaling the mountain fresh air, the sounds of the mountain…”
Her whole body relaxed. I could see her inner smile as there were face tone shifts and the energy of peace in her, shoulders relaxing in her chair. I asked her to open her eyes briefly and “tell me what you’re noticing in terms of thoughts?”
“I am aware of my breath mostly,” she said, “I was thinking of the trees and a little creek.”
“That’s beautiful. So not much thought, just sensations of breath, awareness of the beauty of trees and perhaps the sound of water,” I said.
Then “…close your eyes again and absorb the sound of creek and release whatever concerns you’ve been having in the creek. Like you would toss a stone into the creek, release on your exhale into the creek. The water easily transforms whatever it carries.”
I asked her if she’s noticed that in awesome places in nature there’s sense or feeling inside that’s warm, tingling or light, like you can feel what BEAUTIFUL feels like… inside.
“Yes,” with a smile and taking her hand to her heart, “It’s around my heart.”
“Yes, that’s right. The light and warmth is inside your heart,” I said. (It can be in the belly, in the hands and the solar plexus too – anywhere).
Continuing, “And like the heat of the sun, sometimes you’ve been aware of that connection in your heart, and other times you’ve not been so aware. Like when you cannot feel the sun’s heat at midnight, but you know the sun’s still as hot as ever.”
The above is the beginnings of a Transforming Grief with Essence session. It is something I’d love to share with you. In a safe and anonymous experiential online course, I’ll expand on the concept of ESSENCE as eternally present and how that knowledge shifts the shock and pain of grief.
Within this pain free and uplifting process, you can experience for yourself how the client above could heal and clear shame within the very first session. It’s actually kind of thrilling to know that communication and exploration with grief can be a spiritually deep and safe process to learn and share with those in experiencing grief.
I’m thankful to know how to get someone in touch with the deep and present love of those who have completed their journey in a human form.
For myself, I connect with many friends and family members who are not in their bodies and feel the essence of their love for me. This helps to alleviate the stuck part of my brain that would focus on how they died or how I should have been better for them.
I once was scared of discussing grief as I didn’t want to make the pain worse. Now, It feels wonderful to go to such deeply touching places knowing I’m doing something transformational and intuitively appealing to everyone I’ve ever shared it with.
And, I absolutely cry and laugh with my clients during the process. My own intuitive skills have increased by being okay with communication to extend beyond what the logical mind determines as real.
This client was free of shame and it’s never returned. Her mother “spoke” to her when I asked her to close her eyes and sense her mother. She began to laugh immediately, “Oh yeah, that’s her, she’s feisty as ever.” And then her mother said, “Get on with things. I’m not in pain. I always feel love for you. Don’t let me stop you.”
Boom. Done. Finished. The message cleared the shame.
Click below for the details of the virtual class on Tuesday, March 10th (3pm Pacific, 6pm Eastern).